Saturday, January 26, 2013

What goes around (Moments, III)

One month and ten days ago, the aftermath of a tragedy began to take grasp of a lot of breaths in places even much farther than the core of the incident. Having drowned in every detail for weeks and weeks to come, I was at a continuous loss of words at the horrifying imagery that would be projected in my mind. To add to it, two very sad things took place after the incident, as if the incident wasn't big enough in itself – her demise, and change that is still gradual.

I failed to understand how jokes (in that duration, at the very least), could make people laugh. What Christmas? What New Years? How could anything even go on? But it did, right?
Though I still wish we could've turned back the clocks on this.

I was at a lack of words, but I did what I could in a different medium, to show the change that Delhi was not only desperate for, but also deserves.

A lot is to be said about the restlessness, and the relentless want for change. However, I believe that this must be channelized correctly to hope for induction. Because waving words around when you don't know what they will result in accomplishes results by chance.
Or perhaps my lack of words stood tall because silence is, sometimes, just more powerful.


A lack of words is a strange phenomenon resulting from a strange emotional, and/or psychological experience to  list the least. It is strange because an experience of similar magnitude can result in contrast; an upsurge of words, even dripping off the chin.

Some moments induce a change in you. They give you things, and take things away from you. Moments like these, when you have the words ready to burst out and blurt through without control, you tie your tongue in a knot – because those are the words that put you in that moment.

Sometimes, you cross the line without intending to, or even knowing it, and that results in change. For better or for worse? That depends. You don't care for that yet. You just want a response. But you tread carefully now, for you cannot be reckless enough to bring in another such moment.

So you freeze without an answer.

Quite a while ago, I told someone, "...I may not have described it well enough, but some moments will tell you what I couldn't," but I wonder now, does that person of gold remember? Or is everything just coming back around?